Blogging has proven to be difficult during the week, mostly because I'm lazy. However, this week had some interesting events, both wedding and non-wedding related.
For those who have been following my blog, you were aware that I was starting to work out for essentially the first time in my life when my elliptical machine broke. Tuesday was the day for this to be fixed. I raced home to meet the technician at 5pm. I opened the door and was nearly knocked over by the smell of dog shit. Oh yes, Austin picked today of all days to have a "loose stool" in his crate (this is the first time he has done this in a year). Now, we have a dog walker who comes at lunch since they can't last 12 hours in their crates, but she had left her standard note saying she was there so clearly this crime had recently occurred. I had just begun to clean up the mess when the doorbell rang. Great, I could barely stand to be in the house and i love these dogs, let alone a guy making minimal money coming to install a belt on my elliptical machine. I sprayed febreeze everywhere, worst trick in the book, and opened the door. I explained i had just gotten home and the dog had gotten sick in his crate and sorry about the smell. I'm pretty sure he did the repair in record time. None the less, the elliptical is fixed and 'Operation Wedding Dress' is back in action.
In wedding related news, we got our save the date magnets. Ryan was pleased with his work of picking them out. They will be coming soon to a mailbox near you due to the fact that 70% of the people invited are going to have to travel to the event. I never thought of Indianapolis as a destination wedding locale....
Speaking of destination locations, i went to the travel agency yesterday to get some honeymoon information. Due to the Internet, I dont see the value in travel agencies these days unless they can give you discounts. So i walked in with high hopes. These hopes came crashing down when I walked in and no one was there, hmmm. I stood there for an awkward second and then around the corner came an older man who wasn't a day younger than 80 and asked if he could help me. I thought, 'sir, you clearly haven't traveled in the post-WWII era, how can you help me.' I told him i was looking for information on a honeymoon and he said his daughter owned the place and could help me (thank god!). She was helpful....though just quoted me prices off the Internet. I was about to go when i asked her if there were any locations i hadn't named that she thought Ryan and I might like. She suggested an Alaskan cruise. My initial reaction was 'yeah whatever' but when i got home I actually looked through the brochure and thought this was exactly what Ryan and I would like. Neither of us are 'lay on the beach people.' Ryan tells everyone he is allergic to the sun and I hate the feeling of sand - yes, we are two freaks who belong together. Alaskan Cruise for 7 days plus 4 days touring the land seemed ideal. The catch, as many can guess, will be the price. Just as Hawaii was over the $5k budget Ryan imposed, so is the cruise. So I will be pondering over the next couple weeks how to afford this trip....suggestions welcome.
And finally, I have been trying to save money for the aforementioned honeymoon and as such, a couple months ago, decided to stop getting my hair done every month for $200 a pop. It's not cheap to look this good. So, i decided to forgo this expense and get just a hair cut every 2 months like the commoners and just touch up my highlights. Last month at CVS i found a light brown hair dye that I thought matched my hair color, but when it dried, didn't really do much but tint my hair a reddish color...clearly I was wrong. This time, i was convinced I had found a color that would work better. After going through the process though, I'm pretty sure i picked the same color and just added more ugly reddish tint to my hair. Luckily, I work with a bunch of men who will make it very clear what they think of my hair tomorrow. It's fine.
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Monday, September 21, 2009
Uncles
I am currently watching the Colts game while writing this blog and am not a fan of the ESPN announcing staff. They are not as bad as Madden and his non-value added comments, but they are pretty bad. Ryan has retreated into the bedroom so I am free to yell at the TV to my hearts content. The dogs aren't sure what to do about this behavior. On a positive note, my elliptical is getting repaired, FINALLY, tomorrow. This means i can get back to working out and hopefully return my ass to normal size.
A very important piece of information has come to my attention in recent days. It seems that my esteemed (paternal) Uncles are concerned for my use of poor grammar whilst blogging. Perhaps they are of the impression that I intend to submit my blog for consideration of the Pulitzer Prize. Whatever their motivation for concern, they will be sad to know that I have no intention of rectifying the situation. My grandmother unfortunately passed on this knack for grammar to my uncles and since I was too young to remember her, my father insisted on correctly my brother and I at every opportunity. Sadly, like an undercooked pasta thrown against a wall, this did not stick with me. And so i say, It's Fine.
My Uncles each have a special place in my heart of course...each of them thinking they are my "favorite uncle," and each trying to embarrass me any way they can. My Uncle Alan is the exception to the rest of the Uncles and is always very nice to me, but last I heard, he was not even aware of the Internet and is not likely reading this. My Uncle Bob and Uncle Tom led the Macarena, to my horror, in a bowling alley one year and has since requested it at every event we attend in my honor. And my Uncle Steve. Nothing says love more than when he takes out his dentures to please a crowd. I'm hoping neither the Macarena nor the dentures make an appearance at my wedding.
A very important piece of information has come to my attention in recent days. It seems that my esteemed (paternal) Uncles are concerned for my use of poor grammar whilst blogging. Perhaps they are of the impression that I intend to submit my blog for consideration of the Pulitzer Prize. Whatever their motivation for concern, they will be sad to know that I have no intention of rectifying the situation. My grandmother unfortunately passed on this knack for grammar to my uncles and since I was too young to remember her, my father insisted on correctly my brother and I at every opportunity. Sadly, like an undercooked pasta thrown against a wall, this did not stick with me. And so i say, It's Fine.
My Uncles each have a special place in my heart of course...each of them thinking they are my "favorite uncle," and each trying to embarrass me any way they can. My Uncle Alan is the exception to the rest of the Uncles and is always very nice to me, but last I heard, he was not even aware of the Internet and is not likely reading this. My Uncle Bob and Uncle Tom led the Macarena, to my horror, in a bowling alley one year and has since requested it at every event we attend in my honor. And my Uncle Steve. Nothing says love more than when he takes out his dentures to please a crowd. I'm hoping neither the Macarena nor the dentures make an appearance at my wedding.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Life Lessons from Gift Registries
Indeed, it has been a week since my last post. Apologies to my fan (Michelle). Sadly, blogging does not pay my bills and work this week was a bit insane. A highlight from my work week occurred when i was running late (shocking) on Wednesday. I grabbed oatmeal to eat at the office. Starving, I went into our kitchen at work, put oatmeal in our overpriced office dishes and then walked over to the carafe labeled "Hot Water." Now, i have made hot tea before using this exact carafe, so when i pushed the plunger on the carafe I was less than thrilled to watch coffee come spraying all over my oatmeal. I yelled a few choice words and in comes our secretary. "Oops, it looks like i put coffee in the wrong carafe, he he he." And thus, i started my day forced to eat coffee flavored oatmeal....yummy.
In wedding related news, I attended my first wedding registry event with my bridesmaid Erin. For purposes of this post, I shall refer to Erin as the registry nazi. This is a term of endearment, because without her help, I would have been hopeless. Until this point, I thought registering would be very exciting...the thought of selecting all the things i wanted seemed like an ideal way to spend a morning. HA! So, off to Crate and Barrel on Sunday morning for mimosas and registering, I was enthusiastic. When we arrived, it appeared I had missed the memo that this was a couples thing. I could not imagine Ryan getting excited about registering nor sipping mimosas on a Sunday morning. When checking in when we arrived, I was tempted to inform the sales person that Erin was my life partner, but remembered we are in Texas, where guns and ultra conservative opinions run rampant. We got our scanner and our instructions and were let loose in the store. It is a bit early to register but I am taking advantage of these events cause you get free food and a gift, so why not! Overall, it was a success and I'm glad to have one done.
I have created a list of my top 5 lessons learned from the event for my next marriage...just kidding Parents!
1. It is amazing I have been able to make it through life without having the 3 different cutting boards I was forced to register for by the registry nazi. During my first year living in an apartment, I learned the hard lesson as to why it is NOT okay to use the counter as a built in cutting board. So i could get on board with one cutting board. Sadly, I was educated that a wood cutting board is acceptable for certain foods, meat required a second type of material and a third cutting board that is smaller which allows one to cut vegetables and then easily pour them into a bowl. My biggest concern here is that i don't eat vegetables.
2. Apparently, it is NOT okay to offer guests paper napkins. Therefore, I am soon to be the proud owner of cloth table and cocktail napkins. I consider this unnecessary and was astonished at the amount of selection these cloth napkins come in. When making fun of this phenomenon the sales person gave me an evil look. I scanned the cloth atrocities and moved on.
3. Begrudgingly, I registered for a glass pitcher. Don't get me wrong, i like the pitcher, but until the registry nazi told me it was NOT okay to use my brita pitcher when guests are over, I would not have even gone down the pitcher aisle. But, since we were in the aisle, i decided to also register for a cool cocktail pitcher...that's more my speed.
4. Place settings. It is still not clear to me why one requires so many dishes to eat a simple meal. I scanned the large dinner plate I selected and started to move on. The registry nazi informed me that I needed to register for salad plates, dessert plates, and coffee mugs. Umm, what? First of all, i registered for 12 sets...I don't have a table big enough for 12 people, nor do we even have 12 friends down here in Houston, haha. Second, what is wrong with putting all the food on one plate? Seems to me this is a retail ploy to get more money. And finally, when I attempted to register for 2 different times of dishes, the registry nazi almost fainted. Apparently this is not allowed in the etiquette book. Sigh.
5. Last, but not least, a very important lesson learned by both myself and the registry nazi. When registering, apparently it is NOT okay to wear jeans and an nice top. When we arrived, I was confused. Each of the other females attending the event had on identical outfits. A top covered by a cardigan with dressy knee length shorts and high heels, hair done, full make-up. These southern bells looked like they were at their rehearsal dinner, not Crate and Barrel at 9am on a Sunday. Their respective men looked equally as nice, but bored beyond belief. I may not know why you need two forks at a place setting, but i sure know that 95% (shout-out to Uncle Bob) of men would rather be where i usually can be found on any given sunday.....on the couch or at a bar enjoying a good football game with a beer and burger.
In wedding related news, I attended my first wedding registry event with my bridesmaid Erin. For purposes of this post, I shall refer to Erin as the registry nazi. This is a term of endearment, because without her help, I would have been hopeless. Until this point, I thought registering would be very exciting...the thought of selecting all the things i wanted seemed like an ideal way to spend a morning. HA! So, off to Crate and Barrel on Sunday morning for mimosas and registering, I was enthusiastic. When we arrived, it appeared I had missed the memo that this was a couples thing. I could not imagine Ryan getting excited about registering nor sipping mimosas on a Sunday morning. When checking in when we arrived, I was tempted to inform the sales person that Erin was my life partner, but remembered we are in Texas, where guns and ultra conservative opinions run rampant. We got our scanner and our instructions and were let loose in the store. It is a bit early to register but I am taking advantage of these events cause you get free food and a gift, so why not! Overall, it was a success and I'm glad to have one done.
I have created a list of my top 5 lessons learned from the event for my next marriage...just kidding Parents!
1. It is amazing I have been able to make it through life without having the 3 different cutting boards I was forced to register for by the registry nazi. During my first year living in an apartment, I learned the hard lesson as to why it is NOT okay to use the counter as a built in cutting board. So i could get on board with one cutting board. Sadly, I was educated that a wood cutting board is acceptable for certain foods, meat required a second type of material and a third cutting board that is smaller which allows one to cut vegetables and then easily pour them into a bowl. My biggest concern here is that i don't eat vegetables.
2. Apparently, it is NOT okay to offer guests paper napkins. Therefore, I am soon to be the proud owner of cloth table and cocktail napkins. I consider this unnecessary and was astonished at the amount of selection these cloth napkins come in. When making fun of this phenomenon the sales person gave me an evil look. I scanned the cloth atrocities and moved on.
3. Begrudgingly, I registered for a glass pitcher. Don't get me wrong, i like the pitcher, but until the registry nazi told me it was NOT okay to use my brita pitcher when guests are over, I would not have even gone down the pitcher aisle. But, since we were in the aisle, i decided to also register for a cool cocktail pitcher...that's more my speed.
4. Place settings. It is still not clear to me why one requires so many dishes to eat a simple meal. I scanned the large dinner plate I selected and started to move on. The registry nazi informed me that I needed to register for salad plates, dessert plates, and coffee mugs. Umm, what? First of all, i registered for 12 sets...I don't have a table big enough for 12 people, nor do we even have 12 friends down here in Houston, haha. Second, what is wrong with putting all the food on one plate? Seems to me this is a retail ploy to get more money. And finally, when I attempted to register for 2 different times of dishes, the registry nazi almost fainted. Apparently this is not allowed in the etiquette book. Sigh.
5. Last, but not least, a very important lesson learned by both myself and the registry nazi. When registering, apparently it is NOT okay to wear jeans and an nice top. When we arrived, I was confused. Each of the other females attending the event had on identical outfits. A top covered by a cardigan with dressy knee length shorts and high heels, hair done, full make-up. These southern bells looked like they were at their rehearsal dinner, not Crate and Barrel at 9am on a Sunday. Their respective men looked equally as nice, but bored beyond belief. I may not know why you need two forks at a place setting, but i sure know that 95% (shout-out to Uncle Bob) of men would rather be where i usually can be found on any given sunday.....on the couch or at a bar enjoying a good football game with a beer and burger.
Saturday, September 12, 2009
9 months and counting...
For those keeping track, which i'm sure is no one but me, today is 9 months until our wedding. Kinda weird to think i could have a baby in that amount of time...yikes, not for a few more years (sorry mom). I can hardly take care of myself. In any case, things with the wedding remain pretty low key. I did order our save the date magnets though. I had assumed this would be a simple process. I under estimated that Ryan would actually have an opinion about this since he had zero opinions about anything wedding related at this point. So, i ordered several magnet samples and when they arrived, he inquired as to what i was doing and when i explained it to him, he stated he did not like the ones i picked and wanted to look at all the options. I of course, made fun of him but let him pick out the one he liked. Coming soon to a mailbox near you. I was also put on notice by Ryan that he thinks my blog is stupid since "anyone reading it I probably talk to all the time anyway" and also advised me he did not want me to write about him. I explained to him, as i did to my mother after my initial post, that I will continue to write about them and further protests to this will result in increased postings about them.
In un-related wedding news, Ryan and I decided to spend the day sprucing up our love nest. As I explained in a previous blog, our dog Austin eats everything he can fit in his mouth. This includes the carpet in our master bedroom. While the carpet was ruined several months ago when i attempted to clean it using bleach (note to self, dumb idea), Austin managed to ruin it more when he started eating the carpet by the door threshold. This has progressed over the past few weeks to where he is actually eating the carpet pad as well. I was awoken this morning to him throwing up the carpet and pad next to my face in bed. Yummy. I put my foot down and off Ryan and I went to Lowes to resolve this issue. Since we rent our house, we did not want to take drastic measures (that will come later when we are robbed of our security deposit). Therefore, we purchased an item that cost only $5.99. That item was a rolll of clear duct tape. Indeed, we trimmed the carpet evenly and duct taped the hell out of it to the cement slab. If that doesn't scream ghetto, i'm not sure what does. But I'm certain it will be a good 2-3 days before he figures out how to eat that.
Finally, today is also my ten year high school reunion. It's not clear to me, nor will it ever be, why people insist on holding reunions to catch up with people they dont care enough about to keep in touch with in the first place. I went to a large high school, so right off the bat, i didnt know half the people when i was in school. What would be the point of "catching up" with these people? The remainder of the people i knew, only a handful I kept in touch with when i went to college and now, the only person i still keep in touch with is Michelle, and thats only cause her parents pay me. Now, with Facebook, i find it even easier to avoid akward social events such as this by simply stalking people on Facebook. The 5 minutes it takes me to see what people from good ole North Central are up to is enough for me for 10 years. Perhaps if I went to a small school i might entertain this reunion idea but at the end of the day, i just dont really like people, thus, why i became an HR Manager.
In un-related wedding news, Ryan and I decided to spend the day sprucing up our love nest. As I explained in a previous blog, our dog Austin eats everything he can fit in his mouth. This includes the carpet in our master bedroom. While the carpet was ruined several months ago when i attempted to clean it using bleach (note to self, dumb idea), Austin managed to ruin it more when he started eating the carpet by the door threshold. This has progressed over the past few weeks to where he is actually eating the carpet pad as well. I was awoken this morning to him throwing up the carpet and pad next to my face in bed. Yummy. I put my foot down and off Ryan and I went to Lowes to resolve this issue. Since we rent our house, we did not want to take drastic measures (that will come later when we are robbed of our security deposit). Therefore, we purchased an item that cost only $5.99. That item was a rolll of clear duct tape. Indeed, we trimmed the carpet evenly and duct taped the hell out of it to the cement slab. If that doesn't scream ghetto, i'm not sure what does. But I'm certain it will be a good 2-3 days before he figures out how to eat that.
Finally, today is also my ten year high school reunion. It's not clear to me, nor will it ever be, why people insist on holding reunions to catch up with people they dont care enough about to keep in touch with in the first place. I went to a large high school, so right off the bat, i didnt know half the people when i was in school. What would be the point of "catching up" with these people? The remainder of the people i knew, only a handful I kept in touch with when i went to college and now, the only person i still keep in touch with is Michelle, and thats only cause her parents pay me. Now, with Facebook, i find it even easier to avoid akward social events such as this by simply stalking people on Facebook. The 5 minutes it takes me to see what people from good ole North Central are up to is enough for me for 10 years. Perhaps if I went to a small school i might entertain this reunion idea but at the end of the day, i just dont really like people, thus, why i became an HR Manager.
Monday, September 7, 2009
Speedbumps
Two unfortunate events occurred last night. First, the wedding work out plan has come to a screeching halt. Not, as some may assume because I'm a lazy ass though. While working out on Friday, Ryan and I noticed the elliptical was making an odd noise. I of course said "It's Fine" and kept plugging along. However, on Sunday when i attempted to work out again, it became apparent all was not fine as the noise had gotten louder. Upon removing the wheel cover, we discovered the belt had sliced in half and was hanging off. I would like to assume this was from the rigorous exercise i had been doing. Sadly, the safer bet is that it was never put together right. So, due to the holiday weekend, I shall be calling Nordictrack on Tuesday and getting full use out of our warranty. Stay tuned for the drama on that one.
The second unfortunate event involves our honeymoon. Ryan and I had planned to go to Hawaii...although at random times he still insists on going to Europe, not for the romance, but to attend a motorcycle race. I think not. Good thing for me, he has no passport. In any case, the plan was to go to Hawaii. However, upon further review, to stay where I wanted to stay and do the things we wanted to do, the cost was looking to be about $10k. Ryan almost went through the roof when I shared this small detail with him. So, I am now taking suggestions on Honeymoon options and have been given a strict budget of $5k.
The second unfortunate event involves our honeymoon. Ryan and I had planned to go to Hawaii...although at random times he still insists on going to Europe, not for the romance, but to attend a motorcycle race. I think not. Good thing for me, he has no passport. In any case, the plan was to go to Hawaii. However, upon further review, to stay where I wanted to stay and do the things we wanted to do, the cost was looking to be about $10k. Ryan almost went through the roof when I shared this small detail with him. So, I am now taking suggestions on Honeymoon options and have been given a strict budget of $5k.
Sunday, September 6, 2009
Beginning of my Labor Day Weekend
With all (three) of my friends gone or busy this weekend, I had intended to get new tennis shoes on Friday. This was necessary due to the fact that Austin, who had previously eaten part of the heel off, finished the job by eating the toe completely. I'm pretty sure he is part goat. He has eaten 3 pairs of my flip flops (one of them being my beloved ugly crocs), many pairs of my underwear, towels, Ryan' backpack, the handle off my suitcase, computer cables, three TV remotes, my phone charger, my remote login token from work and most recently, my $300 eyeglasses. In his defense, he usually brings the items back to me after he has ruined them so there is no question who did the damage. Back to the tennis shoes, now that they were completely worthless, i had limited options to keep my work out schedule on track. Therefore, i was forced to work out in my Uggs. Note to self...wool and working out do not mix.
Friday shoe shopping was derailed however, due to an MRI that took much longer than planned. For those who don't know, a blood clot took residence in my arm back in January and has refused to go away. Lucky me. The ER doc when i first was having pain asked if i thought the pain was just from a pulled muscle. I thought to myself, "buddy, the only thing i have been lifting with my arm is a Baconater at Wendy's, a pulled muscle is doubtful." So the most recent specialist sent me for an MRI. Not a huge deal, more of an inconvenience. As I pulled in, I was thrilled to see it was in a strip mall next to a giant Specs (Texas liquor store). Classy. Later that day, my afternoon nap was interrupted by an unknown number. Of course I didn't answer but when I listened to my voicemail, it was the MRI place. Odd, i thought, that they would be calling. So i call them back and the conversation, no joke, went like this...
MRI Tech - "Ms. Groves, I'm sorry to inform you, there is some bad news."
I'm thinking, why is the MRI-Tech telling me medical news...was he at the Specs Liquor Store on his lunch break? Me: "Um, okay?"
"Shortly after you left all our computers crashed and we lost all the information from your MRI and the other gentleman who was here."
Seriously? How am I lucky enough to have stuff like this happen to me? Perhaps they need to invest in a backup system??? I'm no IT genius but...
Me: "So what are my options?"
"Well Ma'am, we're gonna need you to come back and have the MRI done again. Of course, no cost to you"
In what universe would it even be logical for me to have to pay a second time? So, now i have to go on Wednesday and have it re-done. I am pretty sure I should just tell my boss "the dog ate my homework" when i try to explain this one to him.
Friday shoe shopping was derailed however, due to an MRI that took much longer than planned. For those who don't know, a blood clot took residence in my arm back in January and has refused to go away. Lucky me. The ER doc when i first was having pain asked if i thought the pain was just from a pulled muscle. I thought to myself, "buddy, the only thing i have been lifting with my arm is a Baconater at Wendy's, a pulled muscle is doubtful." So the most recent specialist sent me for an MRI. Not a huge deal, more of an inconvenience. As I pulled in, I was thrilled to see it was in a strip mall next to a giant Specs (Texas liquor store). Classy. Later that day, my afternoon nap was interrupted by an unknown number. Of course I didn't answer but when I listened to my voicemail, it was the MRI place. Odd, i thought, that they would be calling. So i call them back and the conversation, no joke, went like this...
MRI Tech - "Ms. Groves, I'm sorry to inform you, there is some bad news."
I'm thinking, why is the MRI-Tech telling me medical news...was he at the Specs Liquor Store on his lunch break? Me: "Um, okay?"
"Shortly after you left all our computers crashed and we lost all the information from your MRI and the other gentleman who was here."
Seriously? How am I lucky enough to have stuff like this happen to me? Perhaps they need to invest in a backup system??? I'm no IT genius but...
Me: "So what are my options?"
"Well Ma'am, we're gonna need you to come back and have the MRI done again. Of course, no cost to you"
In what universe would it even be logical for me to have to pay a second time? So, now i have to go on Wednesday and have it re-done. I am pretty sure I should just tell my boss "the dog ate my homework" when i try to explain this one to him.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Wedding Work Outs
So, it came to my attention recently that I have gained some weight. This concern was confirmed by my mother who on her recent visit to Houston said "remember Jen, you have already been fitted for your wedding dress." True. It was time to take action. My solution, buy an elliptical machine. As most people know, my diet consists of Wendy's cheeseburgers, steaks and french fries and I only believed in running if someone was chasing me. Thus, my first romp with the elliptical machine lasted 10 minutes and I nearly required an oxygen tank. It is not clear to me how people can say they are "addicted to working out." The elliptical machine has preloaded work outs, which seemed ideal for someone as lazy as myself, until i realized the shortest workout was 20 minutes. My fitness self-esteem took a hit, but, none-the-less one week into my work out plan and i have now graduated to the 15 minute ranks. Austin (our dog) does not agree with the strange site of me working out. He barks at me while I work out. Chloe (other dog) won't even go in the office where the elliptical is. My response to their concern...."It's fine."
Why Blog?
I must admit, I'm not sure the point of this blog but I always get a kick out of reading my friends blogs, so figured, why the hell not. Mostly, this will be a place for me to update everyone on the wedding progress and how life is in Texas with Ryan and I.
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